Body Parts Doctors Wont Tell You About

  • Selective Deafness Follicle - in males only. Allows you to ignore your partner's requests to do some housework, but still hear every score in the football.
  • Post-Coital Hormone Release Valve - located near the hippocampus in the brain. Within 13.5 seconds of coitus, this valve opens, flooding the body with a sedative, inducing sleep. Male only.
  • Post-Coital Conversational Bullshit Valve - located in the back of the throat. Within 13.5 seconds of coitus, this valve opens, inducing you to say stuff like "You were great", "That was fantastic", and "I love You". So far found in female only.
  • Baskin-Robbins Ice-Cream Centre - part of the brain that gives you a headache when you eat icecream too quickly.
  • Up-sell Axon - Part of the brain that is activated and causes a "Yes" response when someone asks if you'd like to upgrade your fries and drink with any happy meal.

Recent Discoveries

  • Lazyboy Gland - Located in the lower buttocks, it causes one to sit in front of the TV and watch whatever seems to be on, including reruns of cheesy family shows. WARNING: stimulation of this gland can later cause growth of the buttocks, giving one a new nickname of 'Lazy Fat Ass'.
  • "Why am I so fat?" Gland - located at the back of the eyes. Operates whenever you look in a mirror, to distort the lens and make your body appear huge. First appeared only in females.
  • "My hair will return this is just a phase" neuron - Automatic reflex caused by seeing shiny bits on top of head.
  • Internal Alcohol Meter -Allows the body to discern exactly when it's had enough to drink (note- incapacitated by presence of alcohol).
  • Foot-in-mouth Gland - located near pituatary gland, causes the person to say something incredibly stupid, usually activated in puberty and stays activated forever.
  • Arctic River System, a group of neurons located in the oral mucosa, causing the individual to become frozen at the mouth in the presence of an attractive member of the opposite sex. Loopy Kat
  • Perve Rods - Located in the eye. When a member of the opposite sex comes into your peripheral vision these normally flacid rods spring to attention enabling you to zoom in on an derriere up to 250 meters away on a crowded street.
  • Facial Telepathy Gland - Located deep within the facial tissue, this clever little gland quickly produces a large protruding whitehead just prior to a major date.
Submitted by: BodGer
Category: Miscellanous
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